Learning what comes naturally

May 9th, 2007

For three weeks we’ve been attending childbirth classes – two-hour sessions that serve to both reassure and frighten. I mean, it’s perfectly split between “look at how horrible birth is” and “don’t worry – it’s not as bad as it looks.” Between easy and difficult. Yin and yang. The best possible and the worst possible. Either way, it’s quite the process. And we’re learning how to handle it.

It’s an interesting concept – we are taking a class to learn what has come naturally to humans for thousands of years. I doubt that medieval families were practicing their breathing, and I know that Renaissance era damsels weren’t concerned about electronic heart monitors and other modern conveniences. The rules have changed. Just 20 years ago, the standard method was legs up, stirrups at the ready. It’s a lot better now.

We’re doing it through a series of classes that, at 12 hours total, may last longer than the hardest part of labor. But as long as it seems, it really boils down to a quick briefing, a class without studying, a series of facts that we will barely remember when the time comes. For now, we sit at desks and learn the worst case scenarios – the 24-hour labors and the cutting of nether regions and the massaging and constricting and nearly impossible pushing that goes along with a difficult birth.

In the long run, we’ll feel prepared. We leave knowing more of what we’re going to be up against. For now, we find ourselves easily distracted. We were promised Lamaze but haven’t encountered it yet, instead relying on relaxation methods that Kerrie has already known for years, thanks to yoga classes. We’re looking around and gauging the reactions of the other couples. We’re preparing for birth by cramming for birth.

We find it informative, sure. However, my favorite thing to do is couple watch. We have two couples that barely take it seriously, snickering and goofing and giggling to each other. We have couples that hold hands through the videos. Half of the group shows up with fast food – a late, 7 PM dinner – and eats it during the first 15 minutes. Some couples are older, some seemingly freshly married. Every stereotype is covered – from young professional couples to blue collar. There’s even one cynical, snarky couple that dreads going to class and listening to chipper, cheesy birthing recollections and methods.

(That’s us.)

I sometimes can’t believe we’re going to go through the entire ordeal – that we’re going to enter the hospital one day and leave a few days later with a child – with a bundle of responsibility and love and all of those other clichés. But going through these classes force me to place myself in their shoes. I watch the videos and imagine – yes, that’s me.

Which is much better than before, where I saw myself standing hopelessly in the corner, unable to do anything, forced to consider my place in life as Kerrie gave birth and cursed my name the entire time.

I’m past that now. Now, I know, when she curses my name, I’ll be right there beside her, consulting my notes, glancing at my crib sheets, and attempting to be some kind of birthing partner.

I hope the cramming pays off.


Comments: 4

Issues Considered: Sierra, Vilhauer

On being nomadic

May 7th, 2007

I have friends who have severed all roots and taken the ultimate sacrifice. They’ve driven off, left home, left behind friends, family, familiarity. Safety. They’ve bucked safety – looked it in the face and said goodbye, thanks, but no thanks. They’ve gone town to town without a home, moving along, finding jobs as they need them, dropping jobs without a care. They’ve traveled. They’ve done it recklessly – excitingly, living the life Jack Kerouac would have; that Rabbit Angstrom dreamed of.

As someone who loves to travel, I glance warily at these rouges – these intrepid risk-takers, men and women whose only structure is their feet and their mind. I follow behind, jealously, knowing I’d never sever those roots – have no longing to, actually – but would love to follow in their boot steps, scrounging around the nation without any sort of strings.

That’s the difference. I have been brought up carefully, needing structure, becoming filled with anxiety the second that structure is broken, the moment I can’t see the end of the tunnel. I’d love to go from city to city in search for my soul, but I also love growing up and growing old in the town I always have – lured by the romanticism of familiar streets, of the memories they hold. I’m too nostalgic to ever want to leave. And I’m too much of a subdued wanderlust-filled dreamer to ever stop dreaming of leaving.

I have great respect for those who decide, regardless of connections, to build a raft and float down the Mississippi, conjuring up images of Huck and Tom. I greatly envy my friends who have traveled overseas with only their mind to lead them down the right path. I have dreams that can’t be followed, not without hurting those I love. I have too many ties. I love too many people. I need them near me. It’s not a weakness. It’s a personality. Leaving, abandoning one way of life for another, is so foreign to me that I still can’t understand it.

What I’m trying to say is that I’m a traveler stuck in a non-traveler’s body. Without the ties I’ve strengthened myself with, I’d be nowhere. And, realistically, I could be anywhere. The line is thin. When the ropes strain taut, when the relationships are brilliantly strong, there’s no need to run.

And for those who don’t have those ties, what ever would keep them at bay?


Comments: 2

Issues Considered: Friends, On..., Travel

What I’ve Been Reading – April 2007

May 5th, 2007

Rabbit Angstrom

Books Received:
The Best American Short Stories of the 80’s – Shannon Ravenel (editor)
The Best American Short Stories 2003 – Walter Mosley (editor)
Herzog – Saul Bellow
Amsterdam – Ian McEwan
Love Medicine – Louise Erdrich
The Van – Roddy Doyle
The Snapper – Roddy Doyle
Cover Her Face – P.D. James
The Lighthouse – P.D. James
The Road – Cormac McCarthy
McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, Issue 23 – McSweeney’s Press

Books Read:
Rabbit Angstrom: The Four Novels – John Updike
Rabbit, Run
Rabbit Redux
Rabbit is Rich
Rabbit at Rest

So, I managed to read a 1,500-page book this month.

Let me repeat myself.

I managed to read a 1,500-page book last month. And, technically, some of month before that. And this month. And, also technically, it was four books bound together as one. So really, I read four books over a five and a half week period. When counting my reading output at the end of the year, I will definitely count this as four books. But for the sake of this post, I read one book – 1,500 pages long – this month.

How I reached the decision to tackle this tome came over a convoluted series of events. I had finished reading Cormac McCarthy’s The Road – which, coincidentally or not, I purchased this month (good luck trying to check THAT book out at the library now – thanks, Oprah.) I read a few reviews of The Road. There was mention, for whatever reason, of John Updike. I remembered that Updike was on my list of The Essentials, just as Cormac McCarthy was.

I thought to myself, “I want to see what these Rabbit books are all about.” So I did.

Now, I’ve already written about this on another website (Yeah, I’m late this month for What I’ve Been Reading, sorry.) So I’ll quote from my Millions post how I decided to read all four instead of just one:

I had heard from several people that Rabbit Redux was the best of the four. I found out that the final two books won the Pulitzer. That left three of the four books with a decent pedigree. Then, I thought, “Well, if I was going to read the last three, shouldn’t I start with the first one?” In days, I had created a viable argument for reading each one of the four books.

And with that, I set off on my task.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t difficult. I’ve read long books before – Stephen King’s The Stand (uncut, baby!) in high school, Victor Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame – so I was prepared for a grueling marathon. Instead, because it was really four books and not just one – I found myself getting a break, like reading a book of short stories, only with stories that were 400 pages long, all containing the same characters with the same storyline.

That’s not to say I wasn’t distracted at times – the Augustana Library Book Sale threw some more of The Essentials on my bookshelf in Herzog and Love Medicine. Herzog I’m actually quite interested in, I think, more than usual. Or maybe that’s Babbitt. I get the two mixed up all the time. One’s about newspapers, the other’s about something else. Love Medicine, of course, is Louise Erdrich, and was highly regarded by a co-worker who is no longer a co-worker. I tried to buy it in Minneapolis and couldn’t find it. Weird – Erdrich has a bookstore in Minneapolis that we didn’t go to, so maybe she had snatched up all the copies for her own sales.

I also continued my trend of purchasing an Ian McEwan book on yearly basis. Once a year, at least, I find a stray McEwan book at these used book library sales, and I always buy them, and I always put them on the shelf and stare at them, knowing full well that I enjoy McEwan’s writing but also knowing full well that I’ll never get around to reading the book.

Roddy Doyle was a favorite this year – I found a ton of Doyle books, and even bought two of three books out of a trilogy, which is somehow maddening to my completist mind. I’m not sure how much of this is someone unloading their collection of Roddy Doyle and how much of it is opportunity thinking – I’ve read two Doyle books in the past year and now my eyes pick his books out of a crowd much easier. P.D. James falls into the same boat – lots of her books, all guilty pleasures: mysteries, the forbidden love of many a “serious literature” reader.

Allow me to get even more off track, please. Why don’t mysteries get a fairer shake? Why are they thrown into the mix with science fiction and horror, never classified as truly literary, condemned to be tut-tutted by Philip Roth fans around the world. I understand that a good majority of popular mystery writers follow a crustily formulaic plan every time – Grafton, Braun, Wittig Albert – but those can be comfortable getaways, a reprieve from the seriousness of modern literary masterpieces. Listen, we watch television shows that follow the same path every time, why can’t we accept that books can do the same thing as well – filled with a familiar warmth of convenience.

So yeah, back to the task at hand – Rabbit Angstrom. Like I said, I’ve covered the ideal of reading a series all in a row already at Millions, so you’ll need to go over there to read the post. It’s rather good. I suggest it highly. For those who don’t, I’ll sum it up. In short, reading a series – or even a book and its sequel – back to back (to back to back in this case) allows you to truly become accustomed to the characters. It keeps all of the smaller parallels intact. When you spread them out, your mind starts to get rid of the minute details. You have to reacquaint yourself with the story. You’re forced to get back up to speed. So reading these four books at once made everyone more complete. It was a grand experiment, and I highly encourage it to be repeated.

I understand the idea of letting a good thing drag on – spreading it out and making it last. That’s fine. I’ll probably do that more often, really, because I don’t have the attention span to cover four books in a row too often. I wouldn’t have done it with Rabbit’s books, except that they were bound together. It was a mind game. And the binding won. Because of that, I was able to really enjoy a complete, long narrative where everything stayed fresh, I understood the smallest back reference and nothing was jumbled up in the mess of remembered literature.

The story itself is basic, at best – a man grows old, and here is his life! Marvel in his extra-marital affairs, his stupid decisions and his impossible relationship with his son! Feel the strain as Rabbit’s acquaintances, lovers and – yes! – family die around him! Witness the struggle of a man that peaks in high school – a basketball star that slums around, becomes rich off of his wife’s family business, and never feels comfortable in his own skin!

Rabbit’s greatest skill, really, is running – mostly, running away from his problems. The first book – Rabbit, Run (which, according to the forward, was designed to be a short story – and look how far that short story got him) is about Rabbit running away from an annoying marriage. Rabbit Redux finds him running away into the arms of a couple of crazy people. Rabbit is Rich allows Rabbit to run straight into himself, into his newfound wealth. Rabbit at Rest, he runs again, full circle, away from his wife (the same one!) and his problems.

The time capsule element is great – I love that each book was written at the end of the decade, so Rabbit’s life parallels the average life of 60s, 70s and 80s suburbia. And I love how Rabbit’s son Nelson slowly parallels Rabbit’s own life, running, seeking solace elsewhere.

Most of all, I love how Updike writes. He writes like I try to write. I felt comfortable winding my way through his sentences, filled with commas and sprouting with asides, driving each thought a thousand ways until coming back to rest at the original thought. He gives me a sense of hope – that somehow, I can ramble my way to two Pulitzers and serious accolades.

I’m getting ahead of myself, though, setting the path for the fourth book of my own life. Until then, I should just let this life spread out – there’s no need to rush into the entire series if I can still enjoy everything in its present state. That’s the difference between fiction and life – I don’t have any choice in the matter. I’ve got to let it spread out over time. And really, that’s the only way to do it.


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Issues Considered: Books, Literature, What I've Been Reading

Best-of-four series

May 3rd, 2007

My monthly Millions post is up, on how reading a series (in my case, the Rabbit books by John Updike) is so much better when done in one fell swoop instead of a book at a time over several months (or years).

From The Millions: A Blog About Books:

1. Reading a set of books like this keeps everything fresh. Nothing is missed. Vague remembrances to scenes in past books are still top-of-mind, making every allusion memorable. You also start to see patterns more readily. There’s no time taken trying to figure out where a character or an odd turn of phrase, or a symbol or reference to earlier foreshadowing first appeared. You know. You encountered it just a few days prior.

So, there you go.


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Issues Considered: Books, Literature

A monster voice

May 3rd, 2007

Larry HuffmanThis is Larry “Supermouth” Huffman.

He may not have invented the manic “Sunday Sunday SUNDAY!” voice often mocked for monster truck rallies, used car sales and over-the-top rock concerts, but he certainly popularized it. He’s one of the most recognizable – and most cheesy and cliché – voices in radio and television commercials. He’s even been immortalized in one of my favorite Super Nintendo games – Rock N’ Roll Racing. (“The stage is set, the green flag drops!”)

I bring him up because he’s well respected for being incredibly original and over the top.

He is? For doing that tired old monster truck voice?

Well sure. He invented it. He was making it work before anyone else thought of doing it. And then, in no time, his style was copied to death, sometimes seriously, sometimes effectively through parody, always with a nod to what Huffman had created. Now, it’s either done tongue in cheek with an obviously humorous slant or it’s done seriously, because it works – because it’s familiar, if not incredibly original.

It goes to show that all of today’s clichés – the overplayed, no longer funny lines and voices and concepts, useful only for poking fun at and nostalgia sake – were once clever and effective.

Got Milk? was a one of a kind campaign – one of the best. Now, it’s competing against thousands of thoughtless followers, all banking on the easy gag – the Got (Insert Service Here)? theory of laziness and lack of creativity. The somber, “images of people enjoying life” prescription ads are quickly entering that territory as well – once effective, now commonplace.

Now, quality groups can pull off these clichés in a funny way – they’re fun, familiar and easy to laugh along with. Independent businesspeople with no sense of cutting-edge advertising moxie attempt to pull them off in a serious way, because they have seen it work before and don’t have time to be ultra-creative. Regardless, we all have to look back to the time when it WAS cutting-edge, thanking the person who originally created the idea.

Before a cliché can become a cliché, it has to be popular and original.

Like Larry Huffman. His voice lives on, in a million different ways, both funny and tired, clever and retread. It’s selling everything, from the typical monster truck shows to soda and frozen yogurt. It’s not cliché to him. It’s his baby, after all.

-

(simulcast from Post Haste)


Comments: 2

Issues Considered: Marketing

The most famous person I’ve ever met…

May 1st, 2007

Can you believe that the most famous person I’ve ever met is Tom Daschle?

Does that even count? He’s was my state Senator for the entire time I’ve been alive, save these last few Thune years. I’d have to be in a cave not to meet him. I shook hands with him at a Democratic Party celebration party back in 1992 – the first year Clinton won.

I helped the Dem’s by going door to door encouraging people to vote. They did, apparently. And Daschle was re-elected. Or maybe he was just there. Regardless, my friend’s dad was talking to him and he introduced me. Daschle thanked me.

I also met Tim Johnson that night.

If there’s someone even more famous that I’ve met — which I classify as “shaking hands or engaging in a short conversation with” — then I’ve forgotten him or her. And whoever that is can’t be all that famous if I can’t even remember a name.

What about you? Who’s the most famous person you’ve ever met?

Just something that was on my mind. I didn’t want you to think I was neglecting BMOWP. I’ve just been very busy and very, um, outside. What I’ve Been Reading will be coming up soon.

So, yeah. Carry on with your day.


Comments: 7

Issues Considered: Politics, Vilhauer