Ed Champion formerly wrote at Ed Champion’s Return of the Reluctant, one of the best lit blogs I ever found. He’s since quit all of that, instead focusing on something called “real life” and writing at the old site with a new name: Edward Champion’s Filthy Habits.

The Top Five Great Films That People Seem to Forget About

1. O Lucky Man!
Recently issued on DVD (finally!), Lindsay Anderson’s masterpiece is a stirring Candide-like depiction of a coffee salesman played by Malcolm McDowell at the mercy of societal afflictions. He is opportunistic, dissolute, and exploited. He tries to reform, but can’t. The only way he can find a way to integrate into society is through a smile. Depending upon your point of view, this may or may not be a good thing. But this film is a pleasant and wildly entertaining Rorschach test that I try to watch every year or two and that deserves far more attention than it has received.

2. Naked
This bleak and emotional offering from Mike Leigh features an intense and hyper-intelligent performance from David Thewlis. You find yourself asking: Who is this asshole? And why is he so interesting? Why is he so resistant to the kindnesses of other people who take him in? Would he continue to stubbornly rebel against society no matter what? Or is Leigh suggesting, much like Anderson, that society is the greatest threat to the individual? You might be seeing a trend in my choices here. The British post-kitchen sink filmmakers (although Leigh probably would hate to be identified as such) seem to be greatly concerned with the damaging form of social constructs in a way that I wish American filmmakers would likewise take on. (Neil LaBute perhaps comes closest, but even his fiery vision has been abdicated for dreck like The Wicker Man.) Until some daring American iconoclast comes along who ISN’T David Lynch, we have this amazing film and Leigh’s oeuvre as a whole.

3. After Hours
When people ask me what Scorsese film encapsulates who he is as a filmmaker, I look to this bravura cinematic performance, which is aided by the improbable combination of Michael Ballhaus’s incredible cinematography and Griffin Dunne’s performance as a yuppie milquetoast. It’s also an intriguing historical document of a mid-1980s New York that has sadly disappeared. I moved to New York last year hoping to find the crazed dregs depicted in this movie, but I’ve been largely disappointed. The “New York as hell” metaphor is here, but played far more comically than in any other Scorsese film. And you’ll never see the line “Surrender Dorothy” in quite the same context again.

4. Thieves’ Highway
Jules Dassin was, to my mind, the only one of the Hollywood Ten who mattered. And this film is an engaging working-class take on noir that is quite unlike any other picture of its type. Depicting the infrequently seen niche of brave truckers who delivered produce in rackety rigs throughout California, the film centers on Richard Conte — a war veteran trying to find dignity while suffering at the hands of solipsistic capitalists. But if politics ain’t your thing, well, this is one hell of a revenge flick. One can’t always settle down in life, but Conte does his damnedest to and finds that life choices and the amoral vagaries of others force out ontological shades he hadn’t expected. This film couldn’t be made today, but thankfully Criterion has seen fit to release it on DVD.

5. Delicatessen
Before settling into a minor art house complacency with Amelie, French filmmaker Jean-Pierre Jeunet (together with his then partner Marc Caro) was a bawdy and brazen filmmaker. This wonderful dystopic comedy has some of the most crazed visuals I’ve ever seen — crazy yellows, greens, and browns reflecting an environment now devoted to a landlord using his tenants for meals. And while Caro and Jeunet had CGI on their side with their other great movie, City of Lost Children, Delicatessen takes more chances, with a crazed plaster-falling finale that recalls the final showdown in Dead Alive (Peter Jackson — another filmmaker who has grown complacent!). There’s even a sweet love story and a wonderful montage that juxtaposes sex and maintenance (later recycled in somewhat diluted form for a scene in Amelie).

Make the Logo Bigger is a snarky look at advertising (and a little about life…awwww) by an art director with nothing better to do. It’s a must read every day. Seriously. I read it every day. I’m not lying – why are you looking at me like that?!

Top 10 Island Films.

If you could only take 10 films to a desert isle.

1. Raising Arizona
2. Glengarry Glen Ross
3. Tommy Boy
4. Midnight Run
5. The Shawshank Redemption
6. Bull Durham
7. Big Fish
8. Heat
9. Snatch
10. The Fifth Element

Mocs & docs.

Favorite documentaries, both real and imagined.

1. Best in Show
2. Bob Roberts
3. Looking For Richard
4. This So-Called Disaster
5. Spinal Tap
6. Confessions of a Superhero
7. Super Size Me
8. Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room
9. Roger & Me
10. Visions of Light

Keeping the lights on.

Creepy, scary, terrifying. In some cases, all three.

1. Jacob’s Ladder
2. The Silence of the Lambs
3. Alien
4. Saw
5. 28 Days Later
6. The Shining
7. Signs
8. Audition
9. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
10. Seven

11. Honorable mention: Jaws. In the theatre.

“Listen, strange women lyin’ in ponds distributin’ swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.” – Michael Palin as Dennis

“I fart in your general direction.”
“It’s just a flesh wound.”
“She turned me into a newt!”
“We are the Knights who say NI.”

Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Quotes uttered repeatedly by Dungeons and Dragons storytellers, Sega Dreamcast collectors and Magic: the Gathering champions. Watched in millions of dark basements and dormer apartments, mouths agape, forming the words before they’ve come across the screen. It’s an awkward kid’s dream – a movie dedicated to dark, dry humor with a plethora of t-shirts and merchandise still available.

What can I say? It’s also absurd British comedy at its best, a twisted retelling of the country’s most famous character. It’s not just funny to awkward, geeky computer fans – it’s actually funny.

The story is timeless – King Arthur, after all, was the English language’s second hero after Beowulf – and the treatment is exacting in its randomness. But the story is purely a vessel for a series of inappropriate and clever jokes. Really, MPatHG is a long sketch comedy presentation, an extension of Monty Python’s Flying Circus, except with a theme and a large budget.

I mean, look at this movie. There are no horses, only coconuts that make a galloping noise. The major enemies are a killer rabbit, a knight with three heads and the Knights that say Ni. The film moves in and out of animation, in and out of historical context and places random nationalities all around England. Yet, it’s completely logical when viewed as a whole.

That’s what makes it so different – it’s a television show posing as a movie posing as a historical drama, a tongue in cheek look at England’s most cherished legend.

It’s classic and silly, hidden and popular. It takes both extremes and brings them together, a combination as unlikely as the themes itself.

Also, it’s funny. And that’s really all you need to know.

My Top Ten Comedy Films (in no order)

1. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
2. Blazing Saddles (1974)
3. Kids in the Hall: Brain Candy (1996)
4. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)
5. Ghostbusters (1984)
6. This is Spinal Tap (1984)
7. The Jerk (1979)
8. A Fish Called Wanda (1988)
9. The Big Lebowski (1998)
10. Airplane! (1980)

“There are many things my father taught me here in this room. He taught me: keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” – Al Pacino as Michael Corleone

There is no bigger movie list cliché than including The Godfather in your top ten. It’s the ultimate movie list movie – a spectacular film that just so happened to be a box office and critical success, winning numerous Oscars and kicking off one of the most revered trilogies in the history of film. Putting The Godfather in your top ten movies is like listing The Bible as a favorite book: predictable, easy and, in most cases, completely justified.

An equally damning cliché, I’m sure, is shunning the easy choice of The Godfather and instead choosing its sequel, The Godfather Part II. This is classic list psychology – like knowing that Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band is the obvious (and justifiable) choice and choosing The White Album or Revolver instead. It shows that you’re smart enough to love the trilogy, but smart enough not to follow the party line.

I’m guilty. But it’s not just list aesthetics that causes me to choose the sequel. I just like The Godfather Part II much more than I like the original.

It’s better. It’s just better.

First of all, while I love Marlon Brando in the original, I think putting Al Pacino on his own helped to steer attention away from the old guard and into a more unpredictable, unrefined character – a man who was out on his own for the first time, unknowingly leading a bloody and dangerous group, struggling to right the wrongs committed by his father while at the same time committing the same wrongs, both unknowingly and knowingly.

Second, it’s more real. What makes the movie more spectacular than the original (a sequel better than an original? Unheard of!) is that it’s even more complex than its predecessor. It’s got more angles, more stories and more moments of moral clarity. Michael slaps Kay for having an abortion (originally described as a miscarriage) so that another child isn’t born into a murderous, horrible family. Fredo tries to exact revenge on Michael – a revenge that nearly ends in murder itself. And the ultimate in immoral movie decisions, Michael orders his own brother killed on Lake Tahoe for betraying his family and himself.

And that’s just the main storyline! The Godfather Part II is made brilliant by its flashbacks. We’re talking about Robert DeNiro, here – playing Vito, learning Sicilian for the part and setting the stage for every waking moment throughout all three movies.

The flashbacks were present in the Mario Puzo’s The Godfather (a novel I read and enjoyed quite a bit, thanks) and are crucial to the story. And while the film was wonderful, the flashbacks clarify the motives and history. Never has one actor been so crucial in explaining a pop culture phenomenon as Robert DeNiro as Vito Corleone.

The Godfather Part II is one of the few movies on my list I don’t own. Don’t ask me why – I’ve just never gotten around to purchasing it. That’s probably for the best – it will be quite a while until I can comfortably watch the movie with Sierra in the room. The Godfather trilogy is not sanitized by any means, and the violence – while crucial to the story – isn’t for young children.

But for those nights that Sierra heads to bed early and I have an extra three hours to spend watching a family more dysfunctional than any I’ve ever seen, I can always rest assured that I’ll be able to find it somewhere on television. Ready to introduce itself to a new generation of clichéd list makers. And ready to introduce itself to a new generation of film lovers.

Top Five Movies that Sierra Can’t Watch Until She’s 15.

1. The Godfather Trilogy – See above for a general description. This trilogy didn’t make my previous “Trilogy list” because of the weakness (relatively) of the third.

2. Glengarry, Glen Ross (1992) – I saw this at a young age. My mom and I made a game of counting the times that one of the actors dropped the “F-bomb.” Oh, to be young again.

3. The Departed – (2006) A great mix of cursing and violence, The Departed took sensibly spaced blood and gore and mixed it with a phenomenal story.

4. American Beauty (1999) – Let’s not give her any ideas, please.

5. Trainspotting (1996) – See American Beauty.

“You really think it’s cool for you to hit the sauce with a bun in the oven?” – Bill Murray as Steve Zissou

There’s something about Wes Anderson’s films that sets my heart “a flutter,” as they say in overwrought romance novels.

It’s more than Wes’s unique style of quirkiness, a style that depends on overly sarcastic wordplay and extreme irony, on great characters in great situations, on side-splitting humor as dry as winter skin. There’s something else there. Something intangible.

I chalk it up to a savant’s feeling, a second nature. Anderson’s auteur vision leads a film from beginning to end. It’s Anderson’s show, and the cohesiveness of his randomness makes everything seem so natural. You aren’t sure why you’re enjoying the movie, but you are. It’s subconscious, really – like sodium pentothal secretly injected into the part of the brain that knows what makes a good movie.

On the best Wes Anderson film, though, most fans are split. Sometimes you’ll hear Bottle Rocket. Other times, Rushmore. The universal pick seems to be The Royal Tenenbaums. But for great lines and a great soundtrack (and Bill Murray’s best Wes directed film) I’ve always been drawn to the Jacques Cousteau spoof and tribute in The Life Aquatic (full name: The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou).

The plot could be straight out of a cheesy action movie: a shark kills Zissou’s partner, and he vows revenge. But the twist is what makes it so Wes-ian; Zissou meets the man who could be his son, attempts to woo a journalist hired to cover the aging (and falling) aquatic star, and goes to war against the shark with his ex-wife and bitter rival in tow.

But let’s be serious. It isn’t Wes’s script or the soundtrack or Owen Wilson or Angelica Houston that makes this movie worthwhile. It’s Bill Murray. Bill Fucking Murray. The man that was revitalized when Wes Anderson came knocking for Rushmore and suddenly respected (again) when Sophia Coppola came begging for Lost in Translation.

It’s his part. It’s made for him. No one else could be Steve Zissou. Just as no one else could be Herman Blume, Bob Harris or Don Johnston.

My friends and I have argued to whoever would listen about Bill Murray’s status as “The Best Comic Mind of Our Generation,” a title garnered not from worldwide support and mainstream films but from a nearly subversive brand of knowing humor: a perfectly placed pregnant pause, a sarcastic scowl or a vitriol-fueled barb.

Bill Murray has transcended the idea of an older humorist being pigeonholed into old man roles. He’s hanging with the kids, passing his craft on to the next generation of actors – actors that were still in grade school when Murray played Peter Venkman for the first time. He’s the older ambassador for sarcasm, and I love him for that.

Hand me that red hat. We have a shark to kill.

Top Five Films with Indie Sensibilities that are Quirky and Cultish and Filled with Dry Humor and Classic Quotes. (Or, Top Five Critical Darlings that People Don’t Take Seriously Because They’re Comedies).

1. The Life Aquatic (2004) – See above

2. The Big Lebowski (1998) – Very nearly made the “big ten,” but was bumped off for Life Aquatic. A smart person’s look at the ultimate slacker.

3. Juno (2007) – I just saw this and liked it a lot. The dialogue is dead-on – current without seeming forced – and Michael Cera plays the part he does best: George Michael from Arrested Development.

4. Welcome to the Dollhouse (1995) – Obsession and awkwardness in middle school. Never has being a complete and utter dork with no friends seemed so funny.

5. Little Miss Sunshine (2006) – Should have won the Oscar last year. In fact, I should have probably just made a list of “Films that Should Have Won the Oscar.”

Honorable Mention: The Royal Tenenbaums (2001).

Hi, I’m Abi Jones, the owner and editor of HeatEatReview.com, the world’s foremost frozen food review site. I just moved from Washington, DC to Silicon Valley and I’m perpetually amused that my state is governed by Arnold Schwarzenegger.

I could give you a list of great films, but I think that you’re probably sick of hearing about some boring, moving epic tragedy that does little to entertain. At least, that’s what I’m telling people when they ask if I’ve seen Atonement. That or I just mutter “I drink your milkshake.” And down a shot of whiskey. Instead, I’m going to give you some insight into the highest executive authority in the state of California.

The Essential Arnold Schwarzenegger

1. Terminator 2 – Judgement Day (1991) – 17 years after its initial theatrical release, the special effects in this movie are still chilling. This movie came out two years before Jurassic Park! And more than special effects we have a story about the subversion of self for the good of humanity. Nowadays, the Terminator would use Facebook to track down John Connor. Of course, a quick search on Facebook yields 500+ John Connors, so maybe not.

2. Junior (1994) – What, you don’t remember this movie? Well, you shouldn’t because it was awful. However, Arnold Schwarzenegger totally falls in love with Emma Thompson (I know, you don’t believe your eyes at this point) and he’s pregnant. Boy, do I wish that men could bear children. This movie may have been a complete waste of the talents of Ms. Thompson and Mr. Danny DeVito, but it certainly made me view reproduction in a whole new light.

3. True Lies (1994) – About 2/3 of the way through the movie, True Lies starts to get bogged down in its lack of a really well thought-out plot. Fortunately, there’s enough ridiculous action to make you forget about the plot of the movie and whether or not you should be worrying about your mortgage payments. For instance, at one point Mr. Schwarzenegger, who was known to his family as a mild-mannered computer salesman, is piloting a Harrier jet, hovering near a Miami skyscraper. There’s a terrorist who has some sort of unfortunate belt-strap attachment to one of the missiles on his jet. So, what does the hero do? He arms the missile, shoots it through the skyscraper (sending the strapped on guy with it) and into a helicopter full of terrorists on the other side of the building. It is the sort of movie that’s extraordinarily satisfying when consumed with a large quantity of popcorn. It is an action movie with a capital A.

4. Total Recall (1990) – I’m pretty sure that I saw this movie at age 10. I know, this is not a movie for 10-year-olds, but I’m not a prostitute or a murderer and I don’t have three breasts, so I don’t think the movie had much influence on my actual psyche/physical reality. What it did make me think was was holy f*cking crap, the future is a scary place! And that statement has nothing to do with Sharon Stone attempting to kill Arnold Schwarzenegger with her thighs (weirdly, not a surprise), no the frightening nature of the future stems from the classic Philip K. Dick theme of reality vs. illusion. Combining brilliant special effects and the psychic trauma potential in false memory, this movie makes one question more than man’s place on Earth (or Mars, in this case). It makes you ask yourself about the veracity of both physical experiences and memories. It also makes you realize that movie directors had a much more effective vision of airport security than we experience today.

5. Commando (1985) – The greatest wealth of strongly accented groan-worthy one-liners comes from Commando. The plot? Well, let’s just say that some deposed Latin American dictator needs Arnold Schwarzenegger to return to an unnamed Latin American country to assassinate the current president. I know, the pronouns are a killer. No, I don’t know why Arnold Schwarzenegger had to do it. Seriously, you’d think that with the number of people it takes for them to go after his character (John Matrix), they could have just done the whole assassination thing themselves. But no, they make it complicated by kidnapping Matrix’s daughter so that he’ll do their dirty work. It gives the term ‘Foot soldier in the Reagan revolution’ a whole new meaning. Of course, you don’t need to see the entire movie to get a taste of 80′s violence. The folks on YouTube have been kind enough to put together a sort of greatest hits of scenes from Commando:

Todd Epp is South Dakota’s leading liberal pinko commie blogger. He’s also a huge fan of Deadwood, the series (may it rest in peace). He writes about South Dakota politics from the left side of the fence and posts sexy pictures of Obama at SD Watch.

Todd Epp’s Top Ten Political Movies of All Time

1. Citizen Kane
Simply the greatest movie PERIOD!

2. The Manchurian Candidate
(The original not the remake) Paranoia for a paranoid time.

3. Dr. Strangelove
More true than we probably realized.

4. The Great Dictator
Only Chaplin could parody Hitler and make it work.

5. Bullworth
Rap as effective campaign strategy.

6. The Candidate
A look behind the curtain.

7. All the President’s Men
Thank God for the Washington Post!

8. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
Appeals to our sense of fair play as Americans.

9. JFK
Sure, a whacky conspiracy theory but hey, crazier things have happened.

10. Primary Colors
The Clinton reality show.