Category: Isaac

A quick thought on patience

October 1st, 2010

There are times when I lie on the floor and grit my teeth as the kids crawl all over me, their knees and fingernails digging into my back, their laughing so uncontrollable that I get drool in my eye. And there are times when I read and read and read books until I can’t stand it anymore, until I’d just as soon smack little Ladybug Girl for being so precocious and hide Knuffle Bunny in the garbage forever.

And then, I’ll walk onto the next room, or I’ll crawl into bed, and Kerrie will be there, and she’ll say, “You’re a good Daddy.”

And I’ll stop and realize how lucky I am. How lucky any of us are.

Because there are times when they ask of the world for me. But there’s never a time when I wouldn’t give it to them.

How’s THAT for sappy? I think I need another brewery tour.


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Issues Considered: Family, Isaac, On..., Sierra

“What was your favorite part?”

September 12th, 2010

Part of Sierra’s nightly routine is that she gathers the two of us – Mommy and Daddy – into her room and asks us, with all earnestness, what our favorite part of the day was.

Full disclosure: this is a direct rip-off from Dora the Explorer: after every puzzle is solved and the final treasure is discovered, Dora and Boots stare out into the preschool ether and ask everyone what their favorite part of the episode was.

First, Kerrie asks me. Then, I ask Kerrie. Then, we ask Sierra what Isaac’s favorite part.

Finally, we ask Sierra.

What makes this routine so special isn’t that we get to sit together and talk before going to bed – it’s that we get a firsthand look into what makes Sierra tick. Unfiltered, she offers a split second decision on what made her the happiest; ultimately, she’s letting us in on a secret that most kids hold tight, saying, “Mom, Dad, this is the point when you succeeded the most in being a great parent.”

It’s a daily affirmation that she’s enjoying life. It’s a constant reminder that, despite our not always being sure we’re doing the right thing, that Sierra loves us unconditionally. That she’s happy. That we’re doing okay.

“My favorite part of the day was picking strawberries yesterday.”

“My favorite part of the day was going to get ice cream.”

“My favorite part of the day was when Daddy picked me up from preschool and I saw him and I yelled ‘Daddy!’ and ran to him.”

Me too, Sierra. That was my favorite part too.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Sierra

A quick note on children’s brands

August 15th, 2010

Proper spellings of children’s brands that I’ve encountered today.

  • Play-doh
  • Crayola
  • Fisher-Price
  • MB Games

Outside of Crayola, I’d have spelled every one of these wrong. The last is the most surprising to me. Not Milton Bradley, which was a staple of my childhood, but MB Games. Flip the box over, and you’ll see a link to Hasbro.com. A quick Wikipedia search confirms that Milton Bradley was taken over by Hasbro.

In 1984.

My peanut butter is in my chocolate and all of that, right?

In other spelling foibles, Fisher-Price has a hyphen. I had no idea. Also, I swore Play-doh was spelled without the “y.” Funny – I’m convinced it’s spelled EVEN MORE wrong than it actually is.

This is all without mentioning the brand-less watercolors I wiped up yesterday.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Sierra, Words

Growing up

June 24th, 2010

I looked over and there she was, pushing her cart through the grocery store, acting as if she’d been doing it all her life, and while it was only a junior sized cart and while she never actually chose any of the items in it and while she was much too young to be pushing anything that happened to have a six pack of beer in it, she still looked so big, so utterly in control of the situation, so understanding of everything that was going on and the consequences of tipping over the cart or smashing the grapes or dropping the bottle of milk that it kind of made me sad.

Sad because my little girl is growing up.

And then, when we got home, I realized that Isaac is walking and he has a personality and he almost knows which way the spoon works. Meanwhile, Sierra is having real, two-sided conversations and making up intricate stories and developing a sense of humor that is amazingly aware of its own funniness.

Sad, yes. But also proud. Mostly proud. Absolutely proud, like I should be. Like I’m honored to be.

The sadness has nothing to do with what they’re doing. It’s 100% on me and my inability to accept change with the same grace that my kids do. Every single day.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Sierra

Record Store Day 2010

April 17th, 2010

Sierra and Isaac didn’t care about Record Store Day.

In fact, when I told them, out of the coolness of my Cool Dad Heart, that we were headed to Ernie November to check out Record Store Day, Sierra sort of looked at me, blankly, unimpressed and clearly confused as to why her father, Cool Dad though he might be, was suddenly giddy. Confused as to why, within minutes, he had turned into a child.

“Record store?”

“Uh… Music store,” I said, hoping to clarify.

“Music store?”

I should be happy. At least she grasped we were GOING SOMEWHERE. Isaac just ignored me and banged metal measuring cups together.

The weight of the occasion was completely lost on them, but I suppose the occasion wasn’t for them. This was for me. This was a father showing his children a bit of history, a tradition quickly becoming obsolete even in my own life: a record store, with physical records and CDs and videos; music in a concrete form, the way we had always accepted them until the icy hand of technology forced convenience into our lives, sending the value of tangible media into a nosedive.

This was a lesson in locality, understanding the process through which music used to be acquired, much like a field trip to the farm teaches us how chickens were raised before the factory model became prevalent.

Sierra wandered the aisles, pointing out album covers, counting monsters – you’d be surprised: there are a surprising number of monsters on modern album covers – and carrying a VHS copy of the South Park movie. Isaac spit in my ear and grabbed for my hat.

Though it wasn’t in the same location, it was this store – Ernie November – where my musical education formally began. The same could be said for most of my group of friends; hell, it could be said for most of the 20- and 30-somethings who grew up in Sioux Falls

Our high school punk band sold demo tapes in this store. It’s where we bought tickets to our first punk rock shows – mine was Good Riddance – and where we discovered bands that still resonate today: Texas is the Reason, Cursive, Jawbreaker, Hot Water Music.

What we didn’t know then is that, there in that record store, shuffling through used CDs, the atmosphere stained with incense and our opinions influenced by the certainty of indie culture, we were also experiencing the benefit of small business. We were getting a view of music that many couldn’t experience – not because they didn’t want to, but because they weren’t lucky enough to have an independent voice in the music business. The culture of a big box retailer is all about serving the lowest common denominator, discovering new music isn’t as safe as developing taste through the hive mind.

The Internet changed all of that. Now, discovering music is easier. It’s safer. It’s fueled by television soundtracks and iPod commercials, delivered immediately through the tubes and into the warmth of your computer’s speakers.

The unfortunate side effect is that independent record stores are waning, their importance halved. It’s no wonder that vinyl has come back as both a method of acquiring music and as an art symbol of its own: independent labels and record stores and fans of both are desperate to develop a new niche.

And I for one hope it works. Nothing will replace the community of a local independent record store. More than anything, I think that’s what I was foolishly trying to convey to Sierra and Isaac. I was forgetting that these were two kids too young to even comprehend what music means, too naive to understand the significance of this dirty old building, these used CDs and albums, these weird covers with monsters and singers with dirty hair and stupid names and lo-fi music they’d probably never hear.

I probably overdid it. I spent more than I should have, purchased a few albums I didn’t need, even grabbed an exclusive Record Store Day release 7” that I can’t even listen to until I secure a turntable.

But then again, maybe I haven’t been doing enough. Because independent record stores – both here in Sioux Falls and in every town I’ve ever lived or visited – have helped paint a small part of who I’ve become. I owe them in part for my sense of independence, for my reluctance to blindly accept mainstream and for a couple of lasting friendships.

My kids might not understand that right now. But they will.

My only hope is that they’ll get the chance to experience the same thing for themselves.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Music, On..., Sierra, Sioux Falls, Vilhauer

Isaac + Sierra = BFF

April 1st, 2010

I know they’re still young, but these two kids are friends, and that’s probably one of the coolest things I’ve ever been a part of.

Isaac and Sierra

EDIT: I hereby interrupt this nice sentiment to clarify that this picture has a texture on it. Our bathroom isn’t really that dirty. We promise.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Photography, Sierra, Vilhauer

On rocking kids to sleep

March 29th, 2010

As hard as we try to get out of the bad habits of parenting – or, at least, the bad habits we stumbled into the first time around, with Sierra, who at times (like most first children, I assume) served as more of a test subject than a child, our best guesses at sound parenting nothing more than a series of experimentation – we often fall back into them.

We understand that children don’t learn to fall asleep on their own until they are set down while awake – no rocking to sleep, no snoring before letting go. We know this firsthand, thanks to the nightmare of Sierra’s sleep schedule through the first 15 months and her refusal to sleep without a full narcotic dose of rocking and singing.

Yet, I can’t help at this point – a full two and a half years into this parenting business, and over nine months into trying to figure out kid #2 – but want to rock him to sleep. To closed-eyes, shallow-breath, oops-I-let-go-too-early-but-he’s-totally-not-waking-up sleep.

I don’t care if he wakes up, wondering where he is, confused as to how he got to this point, crying and wailing and wanting someone to help him return to the state he was in before he zonked out: in the arms of a parent, safe from the world.

I don’t care if he takes a few extra months before we’re able to set him in bed, turn off the light and say “good night!” without swaddling and rocking and feeding and snuggling and the rest of the routine.

I don’t care, because, as I realized while rocking him tonight, he’s only got a few more months of needing us to fall asleep. Where Sierra is totally self-sufficient in the sleep category, Isaac still clings to us for protection, still curls up in the den our arms form around him, still looks to us for that basic need.

I don’t care, because I know someday that will be gone. He’ll fight going to sleep, but in a different way. In a combative way. No longer looking to us to help him, he’ll see us a foes – as the adults standing in the way of another hour of television.

So for now, I’ll rock him. To sleep. For whatever he needs. And wait for the day when he realizes he can let go.


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Issues Considered: Isaac, Sierra